U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
