This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize