is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize
