So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
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