Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
