Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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