i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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