put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
