My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize