you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
The chlamydia really affected his face.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
