The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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