Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
