Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
It was like giving head to a cactus.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Randomize
