i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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