i think i have two assholes
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
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