if i died would you start the facebook group?
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
