I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
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