The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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