Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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