If i could tip my vagina, i would.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
