Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
