yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
