She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
