God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
