If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Your cock deserves a montage
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
