i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
That's when you crack a 10am beer
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Randomize
