omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
