Girls should come with a carfax report
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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