i barfeds in our rink
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize
