I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
