What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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