Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
