what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
