oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
people are starting to question the shark bite story
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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