sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
