You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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