I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
