Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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