bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize