it was like having sex with a tree stump
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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