I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
