You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
