I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
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