but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
