i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Randomize
