that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
