i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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