How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
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