If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
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