Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize